Arts 

CAPTAIN’S LOG: SCENES FROM A DIRTY WINDSHIELD

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Let’s see … how can I get all these fuck offs and fuck yous off my chest without hurting somebody’s feelings. Probably not possible, but I know there will be many rooting for me as much as there are those sending the fuck yous right back.

It was a gray afternoon in the city. I was on Commonwealth Ave near BU ready to take a right at a green signal in the Mobile Distribution Unit when some goofy broad walks in front of the van and decides not to proceed. Preoccupied with texting on her phone, I gave her an instructive honk and I asked her in the most dominant way to get the fuck out of the road. She looked up at me in contempt, swung her hair over her uptight shoulder and pursed her slutty lips at me and then moved at a snail’s pace. Pay attention folks, that Commonwealth is a doozie and you’ve only got one life to live, and I’ll be damned if I get hauled off for killing some douche bag who thinks they’re defiant to traffic.

I beat the snow this week, but it looks fairly grim as far as keeping our boxes visible after the storm. I will be trying my damnedest to make sure our reader’s have easy access to the street boxes. That is if the Phoenix, I suspect, can play nice and stop moving our boxes. I don’t play your games. I won’t.

With that said, leave our property the fuck alone as we will leave your oaf red boxes be. I spend a good time (not a good time) shoveling so don’t claim any merit for work I do. In the next couple of months I will be creating a guideline distributors (in the spirit of Ben Franklin’s The Thirteen Virtues) will need to follow or I won’t be playing nice. I’ll be a genuine pain in your ink-stained goldbrickin’ ass. Maybe you folks can learn a thing or two from the Metro’s distro.

The next time you think you can jeopardize our property and business, you may want to watch your back. I have just hired 4 quality control agents to storm the streets of Boston, equipped with state of the art technology, overseeing the operations of all distribution companies and their efforts to cooperate with my manifesto. This is how professionals work. Let it be known.

In closing I’d like to throw down my ten cents about this geek Chuck Turner. Guilty and stupid. He took a measly bribe of $1,000 (I would of upped the anti on that one if they were willing to give out bribes. Stupid.) which makes you think how often he was getting bribed to fund his own campaigns. He didn’t have to take the stand but he did as well as throw his lawyers to the side to represent himself. Turner failed at representing himself and shunned his legal defense based on his big ego. Turner, another corrupt politician loud mouth looking for some warped sense of entitlement. Today on NPR (god forbid the radio), half the city of Cambridge called in crying racism. I couldn’t disagree more. He took a bribe which is considered on all fronts, corrupt and lied about it. I think 3 years jail term is accurate. There are consequences with corruption. Many walk away while one man falls.

Every time some one of color is at the stake it takes about 50 people in the city of Cambridge to declare racism before the one being persecuted can even mutter the word themselves.

I know there are many accounts of someone doing worse things and walking away such as Menino’s neighborhood coordinator and, perhaps, personal drug dealer, John Forbes, along with his arsenal of drugs distributed all over the political climate of Boston. What else would explain Menino’s speech impediment rather than an Oxycontin habit?

Pure speculation and not very nice I might add on my part … however, corrupt is corrupt and Boston has many skeletons in their clam-stinking closet.

But in Forbes case, it wasn’t the race card that kept him out of trouble or talking too much. You think a bunch of politicians are going to fuck over their drug dealer? Not likely. If Turner was turning over fixes for some he may have had an easier time with all this.

With all that said, He should of shut his mouth from the beginning, stayed off the stand and let the lawyers do their job. He may of been a free man today.

“No moral, no message, no prophetic tract: Just a simple statement of fact. For civilization to survive, the human race has to remain … civilized.” (Rod Serling).

This week’s very small exercise in logic, from the Captain’s log.

About THE CAPTAIN

Craig Terlino is our man on the street, doing his damndest to get all those papers out into those orange boxes you know and love.
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3 Responses to CAPTAIN’S LOG: SCENES FROM A DIRTY WINDSHIELD

  1. L.Carterino L.Carterino says:

    You Mr.Terlino have outdone yourself.That was pure magic on all parts:No one is defiant to traffic-but a good dose of this town thinks they are when grasping on to their plastic tech in hopes it transforms them into some unbreakable superputz.And the ego on the rise for the fallen
    Turner,had he watched alil law&order he might not have been the’fallen angel’of that surly political heaven.These numbnutz should all watch the snakes in their pockets because it always turns on them and bites them in the ass.And lastly,Rod serling said it right:For a civilization to survive,the human race-has to remain…
    civilized. Great stuff.Keep it up!

  2. K365shanks K365shanks says:

    let me borrow it! No my brotha, you’ve got to buy your own!

  3. Tony Rome Tony Rome says:

    Install a train air horn kit in the van and use it on the next Nordstrom Nazi. Then lower the window and say “Loud, isn’t it.”