Food and Drinks 

RIMMING THE DRINK: UPDATES FROM TALES OF THE COCKTAIL 2011

Posted on July 23, 2011 by CHRISTINE LIU Email

Cocktail correspondent Christine Liu reports live (barely) from Tales.

Roughly--with the emphasis on rough--48 hours into the 9th annual spirit industry conference held in New Orleans, Tales of the Cocktail, I’m pickled tink with creative craft distillations, cocktailian bonhomie, and the sweaty, sweaty South.

This is my second year in attendance, so I have a better grip of what to expect at this booze-drenched convene-a-thon, in terms of blow-out budget events (shocker: corporate liquor companies have an unbelievable amount of marketing money to burn), the jawdropping level of cocktail celebrity in the midst (to name a few, Dale Degroff, David Wondrich, Paul Clarke, and literally every boldfaced bartender in the country), plus the surreal global expectation that a pisco breakfast at 8:30am after ginning it up until 5am the night before is, like, no big thing.

Lest you forget, LUPEC Boston and friends are on a serious tear. There’s a fiercely strong Boston contingent kicking ass down here (read on for the roll call); on Friday LUPEC hosted a most lady-like luncheon, and the “The Boston Cocktail Experience” tasting room was swollen with terrific tippling energy via drinks by the creme de la creme of Boston’s bartending scene. Also, Boston’s up for 3 titles at the Spirited Awards held tonight: Misty Kalkofen for American Bartender of the Year, Drink for Best American Cocktail Bar, and Eastern Standard for Best High Volume Cocktail Bar (see the full list of nominees). Drink a proper Ward 8 for good luck.

On Thursday, the World's Largest Negroni is mixed, mustachioed, and celebrated. Not pictured: The World's Largest Hangover.

Tiny sips for now.
  • “A dirty martini is a vile drink, suitable for both children and pets.” — Derek Brown in “What would Aristotle Drink?“
  • “These Southern men are fiiiiiine. Don’t get me wrong, I’m a married gal myself, but I can a-PRE-cia-ATE.” — Someone from Boston
  • Ed “Ministry of Rum” Hamilton at the Flor de Caña tasting is adorable waxing passionate for the 15-year-old Centenario 21. Also, he’s very tall.
  • Sorry, alt-coffee folks, but iced chicory coffee tastes like something was brewed through a goat’s teat.
  • Angus Winchester sounds exactly like Rob Brydon in “This is How Michael Caine Speaks”
  • Nerd alert: À la the helvetica John & Paul & Ringo & George t-shirt, spotted: “Spirits & Water & Bitters & Sugar”
  • “Dita von Teese? She is not the new bar star.” — Overheard at the Saveur x Cointreau Bar Star Competition (Also: there’s a finalist from Worcester? Cool!)
  • “I like to call this segment, ‘Last night at DJ shaved my ice.’” — Brother Cleve in “Cocktail Culture — Music” (who also, evidently, looks strikingly handsome in a sequined, tasseled luchador mask)
  • I sat down next to man in a seminar who was nursing a can of PBR with the 6-pack plastic rings still attached: “Fallen soldiers,” he whispered.
  • There will be a jazz funeral tonight for “Sex on the Beach.” Let the necrophiliac jokes fly.
  • David Wondrich’s storytelling skills as a hiccuping drunk (as one of the characters) is uncanny, fantastic.

Here’s a Boston rollcall, as far as I could tell. Please let me know if anyone’s missing or something’s awry.
Follow them on twitter (just google them yourself, OK?) to get the head-pounding play-by-play of Tales.

Clio
Randy Wong

Deep Ellum
Evan Harrison, Max Toste

Drink
John Gertsen, Cali Gold, Misty Kalkofen, Bryn Tattan, Sam Treadway

Eastern Standard
Jackson Cannon, Nicole Lebedevitch, Naomi Levy, Kevin Martin

Franklin Cafe / Citizen Pub
Sean Frederic, Joy Richard

Green Street
George Jenich

Hungry Mother
Heather Mojer

Island Creek Oyster Bar
Tommy Schlesinger-Guidelli

No. 9 Park
Ted Kilpatrick

Russell House Tavern
Aaron Butler

Think Tank
Brother Cleve

Toro
Kirsten Amann

Trina’s Starlite Lounge
Emma Hollander, Trina Sturm

Anchor Distilling Company
Kevin Fethe

Berkshire Mountain Distillers
Brandy Rand

M.S. Walker
Andrew Deitz, Ben Sandrof

The Boston Shaker
Adam Lantheaume

Second Glass
Maureen Hautaniemi, Anthony Roldan

Dudekicker.com
Brayden Burroughs, Christine Eslao

cocktail virgin slut
Frederick Yarm

Mix yourself up a martini a Vesper would be appropriate) and stay tuned for a full recap in due time.

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