BEAN COUNTER: VOLUME 14, ISSUE 42

Over 100,000 people signed up for Harvard University’s new online courses, which started this past Monday. “And to assure skeptics that their concerns are groundless,” said one official. “We’ve set up a fool-proof  ‘No Cheating’ agreement based on those age-gates porn sites use.” PLUS 100

Farmers in Western Massachusetts are reporting that weather conditions in August and September have resulted in better-than-ideal pumpkin harvests, answering a common complaint that there just aren’t enough pumpkin-flavored things during fall. PLUS 1

The Dalai Lama’s visit to Boston this past week was marked with a lecture at the Boston Marriott Copley Place hotel, a moderated talk on ethics at MIT, and a super-convincing impersonation of Bill Murray in Caddyshack from Mayor Menino. PLUS 4

An activist effort to stop a planned Family Dollar on Washington Street in Jamaica Plain—after past failed attempts to stop a Whole Foods expansion—is, said one opponent, “JP’s Rocky 2 moment,” adding, “but way lamer. Maybe Rocky 3.” MINUS 3, MR.T

High school students in Plaistow, New Hampshire, are coming out in coordinated opposition to their school’s new dress code. The issue at stake: The new dress code requires students actually be dressed. MINUS 2

THIS WEEK’S TOTAL: PLUS 100

LAST WEEK’S TOTAL: EVEN