This one-minute clip (currently blowin’ up all over the tubes) apparently originally ran during a 1984 episode of the Today Show. I know oodles of strange shit went down in the ’80s, but something, some small ounce of … sound-mindedness … tells me that a goddamn toaster just doesn’t open its goddamn toaster mouth/air-hole thing and utter the words “I. Am. The. Devil” in the soothingly raspy voice of none other than American film, television, and stage actor Eli Wallach. And even if it did, it couldn’t … it wouldn’t … THAT CRAZY LADY TOOK A FUCKING KNIFE AND CARVED THOSE TOAST WORDS HERSELF.
Just watch and judge for yourself:
YEAH THAT’S RIGHT YOU KEEP THAT FIERY SATAN TOASTER … OR ELSE …
OBEY. THE. TOASTER.