AN EVENING ALONE WITH JUST YOU AND THOSE SAD CANDLES @ YOUR APARTMENT

Okay, have those rose-scented votive candles lit up? Properly trimmed and groomed? Chocolate fondue properly … fondue-ing? Good. You’re all set for An Evening Alone with Just You and Those Sad-Candles at The Citadel of Lost Souls (A.K.A. Your Apartment). You can mope, lounge, sob, mope, watch a Russian bootleg copy of Love Story, mope, mope—anything you want, birthday boy/girl/person. ‘Course, it’s Not Your Birthday. It’s Valentine’s Day. And You’re Alone. With Fondue. And, for some reason, A Giant Cupid-Penis Holding A Bow and Arrow. And the arrow is also a phallus.

[Tue 2.14.12. 122 Despair Lane, Allston. 555.545.FAKE. 6pm-forever/going on 30/$ad. @No_Followers. slightmelodrama.biz]