IN THE TUBES: SHIFT YOUR SHOPPING

A friendly holiday jingle from local darlings Michael J. Epstein and Sophia Cacciola.

Screw you Walmart. And you, Herman Cain. Is there ANYTHING you say that is remotely intelligent regarding “compromise” and fixing the deficit? I mean I know you had to look that word up and can’t remember the definition now, but…

I hear a little jingle that merrily destroys you both, you loud obnoxious beefcake douchetards.

Shift Your Shopping reminds the looming Black Friday swarm to take it easy on the big box stores and see what’s being sold at the Mom ‘n’ Pop.

Santa’s buyin’ local this xmas, thereby “strengthening economies, creating local jobs, and building communites.” Yes, building, bringing people together. Because unlike the GOP’s order of importance on immigration policies, which was, quote, “[to be] richer, better, and more inclusive.”

1. richer
2. better
3. more inclusive

The correct, HUMAN, order of importance for our country SHOULD be:

1. more inclusive
2. [which will make the ol' USA] better
3. [and eventually, if we support local businesses] richer.

Help generate up to “2 to 3 times as much economic activity” in the community, and get some sweet shit too. Need nerd swag? Check out The Garage in Harvard Square. Need something upscale for upscale tastes? Don’t forget the many resplendent shops on Newbury Street or the Prudential nearby.

The community thrives when we give it our business. Seek the buried treasure in our city’s less championed holiday shopping gems with the steaming hot winners of the 2011 Dig This Awards.