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ADAPTATION NATION: FANTASTIC FOUR

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Fox is looking to reboot The Fantastic Four, but before that happens we need to look at what they fucked up the first time.
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ELEMENTS WINTER SOLSTICE / HOLIDAY PARTY @ THE PHOENIX LANDING

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Complimentary food from the Phoenix Landing’s delicious brand new menu and the heated dance floor you look forward to every Thursday night (for almost 14 years!), courtesy of residents Crook, Lenore, Fox, and Bonk. Continue reading

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BOOB TUBE: THE GOOD, THE BAD, THE UGLY

Britney Spears is unsure of what is happening in front of her, but I watched it anyway.

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BEAN COUNTER: VOLUME 14, ISSUE 4

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An MIT researcher has managed to create a single computer chip with 100 processors, affirming that science hasn’t given up on engendering a terrible future war between humans and kill-bots with hyper-processing. Perhaps if Billy Cundiff was a robot, he wouldn’t be kicking himself right now. Ha. Haha. Continue reading

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BEAN COUNTER: VOLUME 14, ISSUE 3

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TINY MOUSE KEG PARTY THIS WEEKEND WOOOOOOOOOOO!!! Tebow you’re not invited hehehehee *squeak squeak* Continue reading

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NAPOLEON DYNAMITE: YOU GONNA EAT YOUR TOTS?

NAPOLEON DYNAMITE: YOU GONNA EAT YOUR TOTS?

Last night, we watched Napoleon become super strong and stuff after applying an FDA-banned acne cream to this forehead. His newfound rage brought him to the Pioneer Punch Club (an underground fight club) where he eventually squared off with his brother, Kip, in a Thunderdome-esque cage match. Continue reading

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IN THE TUBES: FOX NEWS DRIVES BY OCCUPY BOSTON

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“SHAME ON FOX!” chants temporarily replaced the “Who’s Streets?” “Our Streets!” chant when a FOX News Truck drove by Occupy Boston last night around 1 a.m. Continue reading

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HOW YOU QUEUIN’: NEW GIRL

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I’ll watch your show if you stop trying to make “adorkable” happen. Continue reading

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MAIN STREAMING: GLEE THE 3D CONCERT MOVIE

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For the uninitiated and unwilling, Glee The 3D Concert Movie is a convincing exhibition of why the show is so popular. That being said, Glee 3D is also the ultimate test of your cynicism. Continue reading