Michael Bay

Film 

ADAPTATION NATION: LIVE ACTION SATURDAY MORNING CARTOONS

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Michael Bay is the bro of directors. He’ll take your childhood, slap tits on it, and fuck it in slow motion with explosions. Continue reading

Film 

REVIEW: STALINGRAD

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Check out Stalingrad if you’re curious how the other side views itself using American cinematic tropes, but only as a starting-off point to other, better Russian war films. Continue reading

Film 

REEL TALK: PAIN & GAIN

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Don’t worry, Michael Bay isn’t secretly a great director who’s just been playing a 20-year practical joke on filmgoers. His latest—action “comedy” Pain & Gain—proves that he truly is the piece of sh-t you’d imagine. Continue reading

LULZ 

WEEKLY DISS: TRANSFORMERS: DARK OF THE MOON

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Transformers: Dark of the Moon isn’t just bad. No, Transformers: Dark of the Moon is enraging. Continue reading

Film 

TRANSFORMERS: DARK OF THE MOON

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At its best, Dark of the Moon is all the rockin’, lasertastic robo-freedom-sex you’d want out of a Transformers movie. At its worst, it’s a serious post-coital discussion about foreign interventionism with a one-night stand that’s overstaying their welcome.

Plus explosions. Continue reading