PHANTOM GOURMET PHUN CORNER

Which of the following recipes for arterial Armageddon is not found on the Fuschia Fatasses’ website?

A) Bacon Cheeseburger Pizza
B) Beer Battered Hot Dog Nuggets
C) Deep Fried Chocolate Stuffed French Toast
D) Endive and Watercress Salad

ANSWER:
Yep, they’re all on there. Even the salad. Which contains three ounces of roquefort cheese.

What is the titular “Secret” of the lavender lardo’s recipe for “Fries with a Secret?”

A) Stuffed with Cheese
B) Crammed with Cheese
C) Chock full of Cheese
D) Stuffed, Crammed, and Chock full of Cheese

ANSWER:
A, B, C, and D. And then A again for good measure.

According the cult of the portly periwinkle, a server that will not seat you before opening is

A) Dumb
B) Moronic
C) A Monkey
D) Seriously, fuck these guys.

ANSWER:
No, seriously. Fuck these guys.

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