• Skip to main content
  • Skip to primary sidebar
  • Skip to footer
  • HOME
  • NEWS+OPINIONS
    • NEWS TO US
    • COLUMNS
      • APPARENT HORIZON
      • DEAR READER
      • Close
    • LONGFORM FEATURES
    • OPINIONS
    • EDITORIAL
    • Close
  • ARTS+ENTERTAINMENT
    • FILM
    • MUSIC
    • COMEDY
    • PERFORMING ARTS
    • VISUAL ARTS
    • Close
  • DINING+DRINKING
    • EATS
    • SIPS
    • BOSTON BETTER BEER BUREAU
    • Close
  • LIFESTYLE
    • CANNABIS
      • TALKING JOINTS MEMO
      • Close
    • WELLNESS
    • GTFO
    • Close
  • STUFF TO DO
  • TICKETS
  • ABOUT US
    • ABOUT
    • MASTHEAD
    • ADVERTISE
    • Close

Dig Bos

The Dig - Greater Boston's Alternative News Source

Book Dispatch: “Crying in H Mart” Author Michelle Zauner Stops In Brookline On Tour

Written by PONETTE KIM Posted April 20, 2023 Filed Under: A+E, Books

“It certainly helps that I’ve memorialized her in this way and it’s been embraced and distributed in a way that I feel her”


Last Wednesday, Michelle Zauner, author of the bestselling memoir Crying in H Mart, visited Brookline’s Coolidge Corner Theatre as a part of her nationwide book tour. She was joined onstage by Pulitzer Prize-winning poet laureate Tracy K. Smith, who asked Zauner a series of challenging, introspective questions about race, grief, and memories.

Crying in H Mart details Zauner’s relationship with her mother, who died in 2014 after being diagnosed with a rare form of squamous-cell carcinoma. Zauner remembers her mother’s affection as “tougher than tough love,” a “brutal, industrial-strength” love. Though they had a tumultuous relationship in her teenage years, Zauner and her mother grew close after Zauner left for college. Notably, they shared a passion for cooking and eating Korean food, and after her mother’s passing, Zauner made an effort to learn how to cook Korean food in an effort to stay connected to her Korean heritage.

Though Zauner has been speaking about her mother’s death for years, starting with an essay she wrote for Glamour that landed her the initial book deal, she sometimes feels worried that she is distancing herself from the event and its emotions.

“It’s been almost nine years since my mother died and I’ve spoken about it so much, I’ve written about it so much, I talk about it and think about it so much and analyze it and investigate it to the point where sometimes I worry I’m taking something away from myself by publicizing it,” Zauner said.

Still, she said that when she sees something that reminds her of her mother or visits her mother’s grave, she still finds herself inconsolable.

“It makes me feel like I was truly loved and I really loved someone when I cry for her, and I still have that emotion that is really deep, but it’s not so heavy that I can’t wake up every morning and do what I have to do and live my life,” Zauner said. “It certainly helps that I’ve memorialized her in this way and it’s been embraced and distributed in a way that I feel her—even though it goes against every sensible, spiritual, secular belief that I have.”

One audience member asked, “Do you think you’ll ever get over the grief you feel when someone is sick or when they end up passing away?” To which Zauner replied, “I felt very guilty about the caregiving process—I felt like a real failure. I don’t feel that way anymore, and I think part of it is, in writing this book.”

The author added, “I had to recognize that I had no guidance. I didn’t have any peers that had an immigrant parent, that had this kind of divide in their life. I had no reference point in media about children with immigrant parents and how that’s different culturally. I forgive her and I forgive myself for being at odds with one another—of course we were, we had no idea.”

Following her mother’s death, Zauner released the 2016 album Psychopomp with a picture of her mother as the album cover. The project allowed Zauner to quit her day job and pursue music full-time, and she credits her mother for her lucky break.

“My life has been so charmed, creatively and professionally, after she passed,” Zauner said. “It’s really hard to not feel like she’s behind it.”

Crying in H Mart has seen incredible success since its release in 2021, dominating the New York Times Best Seller List for over a year, and is now being adapted into a film. In addition to Zauner’s work as a memoirist, she is also a Grammy-nominated musician as the lead vocalist for the indie pop band Japanese Breakfast.

Most of the dates of Zauner’s book tour have completely sold out. The Brookline Booksmith, which organized last week’s event, estimated that there were around 400 people in attendance.

During the talk, Zauner also said that she sometimes struggles with feelings of guilt about her wild teenage behavior. As she’s grown older, she sympathizes with what she put her mother through and acknowledges the challenges she faced growing up biracial in the Pacific Northwest.

“Some hormonal, weird thing happens where, all of a sudden, your mother’s touch is just like an iron and you can’t stand it,” Zauner said. “It’s so sad—as I grow older and I begin to imagine my life as a mother someday, I can’t imagine how heartbreaking that experience must be, to have your little guy turn away from you like that.”


michellezauner.com


 

PONETTE KIM
+ posts

Ponette recently graduated from Boston University with a Bachelor’s of Science in Journalism. She enjoys writing about music, movies, culture and cool people. In her free time, she loves consulting Wirecutter, listening to Phoebe Bridgers and playing with her dog, Honey.

  • PONETTE KIM
    https://digboston.com/author/ponette-kim/
    “I’ll Be There For You” Addresses Having Loved Ones With Possible Substance Use Disorder
  • PONETTE KIM
    https://digboston.com/author/ponette-kim/
    Daring Greatly: TikTok Star Alden McWayne (aka Gucci Pineapple) On Scheming And Dreaming
  • PONETTE KIM
    https://digboston.com/author/ponette-kim/
    Justin Clancy Holds On Tightly To His Dreams

Filed Under: A+E, Books

WHAT’S NEW

Massachusetts Bill, Victim Advocates Call For Coordinated Date-Rape Drug Response

Massachusetts Bill, Victim Advocates Call For Coordinated Date-Rape Drug Response

Report: Fewer Youth Transition Out Of Massachusetts Foster Care System

Report: Fewer Youth Transition Out Of Massachusetts Foster Care System

State Wire: Activists Urge Congress To Raise Debt Ceiling, Resist Spending Cuts

State Wire: Activists Urge Congress To Raise Debt Ceiling, Resist Spending Cuts

Dancing On Banana Peels: Life On Lifetime Parole In Massachusetts

Dancing On Banana Peels: Life On Lifetime Parole In Massachusetts

Justice Department Completes Vetting Of Rachael Rollins

Justice Department Completes Vetting Of Rachael Rollins

AG Investigating BPD To Determine If “Gang Unit” Engages In “Unconstitutional Policing”

AG Investigating BPD To Determine If “Gang Unit” Engages In “Unconstitutional Policing”

Primary Sidebar

LOCAL EVENTS

AAN Wire


Most Popular

  • Over Yondr: Are Cell Phone Pouches At Shows Liberating, Dangerous, Or Annoying?
  • AG Investigating BPD To Determine If “Gang Unit” Engages In “Unconstitutional Policing”
  • Deep Cuts Brings Sandwiches, Craft Beer, And Live Music To Medford
  • Family Of Woman Killed By Commuter Rail Sues MBTA For Crash Records
  • Daring Greatly: TikTok Star Alden McWayne (aka Gucci Pineapple) On Scheming And Dreaming

Footer

Social Buttons

DigBoston facebook DigBoston Twitter DigBoston Instagram

Masthead

About

Advertise

Customer Service

About Us

DigBoston is a one-stop nexus for everything worth doing or knowing in the Boston area. It's an alt-weekly, it's a website, it's an email blast, it's a twitter account, it's that cool party that you were at last night ... hey, you're reading it, so it's gotta be good. For advertising inquiries: sales@digboston.com To reach editorial (and for inquiries about internship opportunities): editorial@digboston.com