Tauk w/ Wobblesauce and Celebrity Look-Alikes @ Middle East
in the moments
my thoughts were adrift
And coasting a terrace,
approaching a rift
Through which I could spy
several glimpses beneath
Of the darkness the light
from above could not reach
I spied wings of reason,
herself taking flight
And upon yonder precipice
saw her alight
And glared back at me
one last look of dismay
As if she were the last one
she thought I’d betray
The Middle East. 136 Mass. Ave., Boston. 8pm/18+/$15. mideastoffers.com
St. Patrick’s Festival @ Harpoon Brewery
If there’s an overriding theme this week, it’s beer and specifically Harpoon, because what better way to celebrate drinking a cold one than with a Harpoon Festival! The first festival of the year for the brewer, the St. Patrick’s Festival, is an early Evacuation Day present, complete with bagpipes and beer goggles. The event kicks off Friday, but there’s also a Saturday session that starts at 1 pm, so if your boss makes you stay late to process TPS reports, don’t fret, the weekend is not a bust. It’s always best to show up early either day, though, as the line can get long just to get in. Thankfully there’s plenty of taps inside to make sure your glass is always half full.
Harpoon Brewery and Beer Hall. 306b Northern Ave., Boston. 5pm/21+/$25. harpoonbrewery.com
Final Month! Somerville Winter Farmers Market @ The Armory
Tomatoes, leeks, and wine, oh my! Whether you’re a tried-and-true organic junky or just looking to support local businesses, the Somerville Farmers Market is a great place to support both. Complete with live entertainment, it’s an experience, not just a destination. The market offers access to dozens of local vendors providing local and regional agricultural products such as vegetables, meat, dairy, grains, and even wine. You may still need to run to Dunks for an iced coffee on your way to work or hit Stop and Shop on your way home for your beloved Fruity Pebbles, but the rest of your sustenance should be local only.
The Armory. 191 Highland Ave., Somerville. 9:30am/all ages/FREE. somwintermarket.org
Slayer @ House of Blues
Last year, Converse Presents brought the Sultans of Satan to the Sinclair in Cambridge, and it was absolutely one of the most destructively mind-fucking shows we’ve seen in pretty much forever. It’s only appropriate that the band’s return trip to Boston has it playing in Boston, and this show will no doubt be just as insane and mandatory for anyone reigning in blood. And that’s it. We got nothing else. It’s fucking Slayer! What else is there to say? In fact, that linguistic bubblewrap to open this blurb was written simply because words were needed in this space. I guess we could have run a picture, but it’s fucking Slayer! Just go. Ignore the rest.
House of Blues. 15 Lansdowne St., Boston. 7pm/18+/$60. houseofblues.com/boston
Boston Bruins @ Florida Panthers
The Bruins are in fourth place in the Eastern Conference right now and playing decent puck, but they need to step up or start cleaning house for next year. Oh wait, that’s already happening. Don’t get me wrong, keeping Eriksson is fine blah blah blah but the amount of activity on the bench and below leads us to believe that a first-round exit in the playoffs is likely and that any depth they’re going to get this year is going to come from the soaking tub. Regardless, these are our bruisers and the Red Cross is doing fine, so give blood at your local pub and watch the boys kick the shit out of Florida.
Any bar. Any St., any town. 7pm/all ages/FREE. bruins.nhl.com
Volunteer @ Boston Cares
It’s easy to neglect the important things in our life such as relationships, health, and well-being. You wake up in the morning tired from the night before and slog off to whatever job pays the bills, often without thinking of or thanking those around you that truly matter. Don’t be that person—and don’t forget that charity and giving back are just as important as everything else you’re neglecting. Boston Cares is a local non-profit organization that works with individuals and businesses to help carve out the time to give back and make a difference in the lives of others as well as yourself by providing flexible opportunities for volunteerism.
Boston Cares. 90 Canal St., Boston. All day, every day/all ages/FREE. bostoncares.org