• Skip to main content
  • Skip to primary sidebar
  • Skip to footer
  • HOME
  • NEWS+OPINIONS
    • NEWS TO US
    • COLUMNS
      • APPARENT HORIZON
      • DEAR READER
      • Close
    • LONGFORM FEATURES
    • OPINIONS
    • EDITORIAL
    • Close
  • ARTS+ENTERTAINMENT
    • FILM
    • MUSIC
    • COMEDY
    • PERFORMING ARTS
    • VISUAL ARTS
    • Close
  • DINING+DRINKING
    • EATS
    • SIPS
    • Close
  • LIFESTYLE
    • CANNABIS
      • TALKING JOINTS MEMO
      • Close
    • WELLNESS
    • GTFO
    • Close
  • STUFF TO DO
  • TICKETS
  • ABOUT US
    • 5 DOUBLE-U’S
    • MASTHEAD
    • DISTRIBUTION
    • ADVERTISE
    • SUBMISSIONS
    • PRIVACY POLICY
    • Close
  • BECOME A MEMBER

Dig Bos

The Dig - Boston's Only Newspaper

CURRENT STREET EDITION

DIG 23.02 – 1/28/21

ORDER UP

Written by ddevelop Posted October 13, 2014 Filed Under: Bar Havoc, COLUMNS, LIFESTYLE

BH_GingerLime

It’s easy to jumble your words when you’ve been drinking.

 

Alcohol makes you get a little ahead of yourself, or it just plain makes you forget. I get it. Either way, as your bartender it’s my job to navigate past all this and get you what you came to me for. Namely, more booze.

 

As you, my little droogies, have often shown, sometimes ordering isn’t as easy as you would think. Your barking out “Grey Goose and vodka, please,” is often met with a blank stare from me. Because you made no sense. It sounded like “gehry moose hand vodpa, pls.” Say it again. Slowly. When customers repeat it and correct themselves, they sometimes take longer than others to realize their mistake. Then there are the orders that aren’t so much a slip of the tongue, but a slip of the brain. “I’ll have a vodka and cranberry on the rocks, in a bigger glass.” Yes, you will, because that is how we serve cocktails. In a glass. With ice. Some booze, and a mixer of your choice. Coming right up.

 

Note: For those in my field, backwards ordering is also the opposite of fun. “I’ll have a Jameson.” To a bartender, this could be a shot of Jameson, or a Jameson neat. The proper response to our confusion is not silence and a puzzled stare, followed by, “…with ginger ale, in a cup with ice.” That’s called a Jameson and ginger, and hey, it too is a cocktail!

 

Now let’s work together here, and for the love of God, just learn how to order your shit without pissing me off.

@BarHavoc


ddevelop
Website
More from author
  • ddevelop
    https://digboston.com/author/ddevelop/
    EXCERPT: 'THE ROAD TO SAN DONATO'
  • ddevelop
    https://digboston.com/author/ddevelop/
    FILM REVIEW: "SMITHEREENS" AND "HER SMELL" AT THE BRATTLE
  • ddevelop
    https://digboston.com/author/ddevelop/
    THE DENTAL CONSPIRACY
  • ddevelop
    https://digboston.com/author/ddevelop/
    YOUR ANNUAL RECAP: MIDNIGHT MARATHON RIDE 2015

Filed Under: Bar Havoc, COLUMNS, LIFESTYLE Tagged With: Allston, Bars, Bartending, Booze, DigBoston, Drunks, grey goose, Jameson, Partying, Whiskey

WHAT’S NEW

Himachal-Pradesh-6-by-CIAT-International-Center-for-Tropical-Agriculture-is-licensed-with-CC-BY-SA-2.0

CONNECTING THE DOTS: FROM THE INDIAN FARMERS’ UPRISING TO THE EFFECT NEOLIBERALISM HAS HAD GLOBALLY

GUEST OPINION: TPS HOLDERS DESERVE PERMANENT PROTECTION

GUEST OPINION: TPS HOLDERS DESERVE PERMANENT PROTECTION

STATE WIRE: NEW MASS PESTICIDE RULES MADE TO PROTECT POLLINATORS

STATE WIRE: NEW MASS PESTICIDE RULES MADE TO PROTECT POLLINATORS

Gov. Charlie Baker announces an educator vaccine program Wednesday in a WCVB screen capture.

STATE ADDS 400,000 EDUCATORS TO LIST FOR VACCINE

INBOX: JOHN BARROS LAUNCHES CAMPAIGN FOR MAYOR OF BOSTON

INBOX: JOHN BARROS LAUNCHES CAMPAIGN FOR MAYOR OF BOSTON

TRUMP GUY WINS THE DEMOCRATIC PRIMARY TO FILL DELEO’S SEAT

TRUMP GUY WINS THE DEMOCRATIC PRIMARY TO FILL DELEO’S SEAT

Primary Sidebar

HEMPIRE FREEDOM PACK 25% OFF

FEATURED EVENT

Most Popular

  • SPECIAL FEATURE ON THE MASS STATE POLICE: TROOPER WILSON’S WAR by CHRIS FARAONE
  • [UPDATE: WE GOT IT!] WHERE IS THE CONTRACT FOR MASSACHUSETTS’ VACCINE APPOINTMENT SOFTWARE? by POLINA WHITEHOUSE
  • MASS KEEPS TRYING TO BUILD A NEW WOMEN’S PRISON OUTSIDE OF PUBLIC VIEW by DAN ATKINSON
  • WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON WITH MASSACHUSETTS POLITICS AND VACCINATIONS? by ZACK HUFFMAN
  • WHY ARE HALF OF MASS CORRECTION OFFICERS REFUSING THE COVID VACCINE? by JEAN TROUNSTINE

READ CURRENT MEMBER EDITION

DIG Member 1.9 – 11/26/20

READ CURRENT STREET ISSUE

DIG 23.02 – 1/28/21

Footer

digbos

digbos
Virtual #event this #weekend. https://digboston.co Virtual #event this #weekend. https://digboston.com/zeitgeist-press-releasing-work-by-late-boston-poet-melinda-kweskin/ #reading #poetry #Boston #Massachusetts
Now, the singer and composer is aiming to take cen Now, the singer and composer is aiming to take center stage himself … https://digboston.com/video-mass-classical-musician-johan-lenox-works-with-hip-hops-top-stars/ #video #music #classical #hiphop #Massachusetts
This is my home. We don’t deserve to live in per This is my home. We don’t deserve to live in perpetual fear. https://digboston.com/guest-opinion-tps-holders-deserve-permanent-protection/ #opinion #immigration #TPS #politics #Boston #Massachusetts
“No one wants to live in a world where music is “No one wants to live in a world where music is created to please a cold-blooded algorithm.” https://buff.ly/2OmuqPR #surveillance #interview #politics #tecnology
Barros is the fifth mayoral candidate to enter the Barros is the fifth mayoral candidate to enter the race. https://buff.ly/3bj3EAW #politics #election #Boston #Massachusetts
Can a veteran of the Wisconsin Uprising and former Can a veteran of the Wisconsin Uprising and former Mass union leader rescue the IAFF? https://digboston.com/a-firefighter-election/ #labor #firefighter #union #election #opinion #WisconsinUprising #Massachusetts #national
New #report shows 1/6 of women in Mass prisons sen New #report shows 1/6 of women in Mass prisons sentenced to life without parole. https://digboston.com/commonwealth-committed-to-other-death-penalty/ #prison #prisoner #humanrights #criticism #Massachusetts
“The gratuitous militarization of police forces “The gratuitous militarization of police forces across the United States facilitated by this program has helped to turn these agencies into brutal weapons of repression.” https://digboston.com/inbox-group-calls-for-biden-to-abolish-police-militarization-program/ #police #reform #criticism #Massachusetts
It’s the second time in less than a year that pr It’s the second time in less than a year that progressives have been dealt a bitter defeat in a crowded primary race. https://digboston.com/trump-guy-wins-the-democratic-primary-to-fill-deleos-seat/ #politics #election #Democrats #primary #legislature #Winthrop #Revere  #Massachusetts #MAGA #herp #derp
As lawmakers consider Baker’s amendments to clim As lawmakers consider Baker’s amendments to climate bill, the fight for environmental justice continues. https://digboston.com/checking-in-on-the-commonwealths-comprehensive-climate-bill/ #politics #legislature #environment #activism #globalwarming #Massachusetts
Load More... Follow on Instagram
Social Buttons

DigBoston facebook DigBoston Twitter DigBoston Instagram

Masthead

About

Submissions

Advertise

Privacy Policy

Customer Service

Distribution

About Us

DigBoston is a one-stop nexus for everything worth doing or knowing in the Boston area. It's an alt-weekly, it's a website, it's an e-mail blast, it's a twitter account, it's that cool party that you were at last night ... hey, you're reading it, so it's gotta be good. For advertising inquiries: [email protected] To reach Editorial: [email protected] For internship opportunities: [email protected]