Boston News Today - TRANSLATING THE GLOBE'S ARTICLE ON BOSTON'S MEDICAL MARIJUANA DISPENSARY

If we’ve said it once we’ve said it a dozen times: Getting your weed coverage from the Boston Globe is like getting your Beacon Hill news from High Times, ordering chicken parm at a Greek diner, etc. Nevertheless, while they may act like the kid in class who keeps reminding the teacher to give homework – always snitching, for lack of a more accurate term – on some occasions, we concede they have the resources to actually cover the details of this unnecessarily tedious issue. When that happens, we lock Blunt Truth and Media Farm in a small room filled with pot cookies and a broadsheet, and record some of the comments and produce a sort of Cliff’s Notes for what’s coming on the Hub dispensary front.

First the good news: We’re finally getting medical cannabis in Boston …

State health officials on Friday approved a highly coveted license for Boston’s first medical marijuana dispensary, selecting Patriot Care Corp. to operate a facility near Downtown Crossing.

Hold on a second. Didn’t mean to get you excited. It’s not coming just yet …

Patriot Care spokesman Dennis Kunian said the company does not have a timeline on when it might be open for business in Boston. He said company officials have spoken to some Boston city councilors and neighborhood groups about its proposed dispensary at 21 Milk St. and will begin the process of seeking approval from city officials.

When they do come, though, they’ll be popping up like Paneras …

The company, which was already provisionally approved to open a dispensary in Lowell, also won permission Friday for a location in Greenfield, making it the only company positioned to run three dispensaries in Massachusetts.

Also, the Globe is awesome and as such will remind you at every turn that they’ve been working tirelessly to keep patients from getting medication they need …

The Patrick administration put the plans of the company, New England Treatment Access, on hold in August after the Globe reported that its chief executive had falsely claimed to be a college graduate on the firm’s applications to the state.

People who work at the state think being a year behind schedule is “steady progress.”

On Friday, Karen van Unen, chief executive of the state’s medical marijuana program, said in a news release, “I am pleased with the steady progress we are making and expect the first dispensaries to open later this winter.”

Don’t put on your party hats just yet.

To date, Massachusetts has conditionally approved 15 applicants across the state, which still must pass inspection and win local zoning approval before they can begin growing and selling marijuana. No dispensaries have been selected for the counties of Hampden, Berkshire, Dukes, and Nantucket.

The article goes on and on about the few lousy applications where the people, shall we say, may have not told the entire truth. You can practically see the editors pounding their chests in the newsroom for exposing these inconsistencies.

“It undermines the whole process that someone can lie on the application and, for reasons that aren’t clear, be reconsidered,” said Gordon Bennett.

Pretty cool to see that Dot Joyce, longtime spokesperson for former Boston Mayor Tom Menino, is talking for New England Treatment Access. State approval or not, NETA faces a certain gauntlet in the City of Boston, and we’re sure that if the roadblocks continue, Joyce will be able to do what no dispensary has done so far, and turn the press against the prohibitionists until they’re forced to budge.

Dot Joyce, a spokeswoman for NETA, said the company “remains well prepared and educated on this emerging industry with some of the most knowledgeable and experienced people in the fields of medicinal marijuana standards and practices.”

Did we mention that the Globe is fucking awesome?

The state announced Friday that it has allowed New England Treatment Access to proceed with plans for dispensaries in Brookline and Northampton, months after the Patrick administration said it halted the plans because the Globe had reported the company’s director, Kevin Fisher, falsely claimed to be a college graduate.