They’re phenomenal, something different and then some. Small enough to shoot out of a small straw and hit your friend in the face. But why would you want to?
Little. Round. Different.
Whatever they are, I certainly didn’t know what the hell I was buying at the dispensary the other day.
I don’t want to call out the specific shop or budtender, because it wasn’t their fault. It was mine. I probably wasn’t listening. Or reading carefully enough. Or both.
If I had been paying attention at all, I would have seen before getting home that I wasn’t going in for just another tin of gummies. Nor was this just one more chocolate product bound to melt in my car in the summer heat, causing a mess not just in my console but also on my chin since I tend to lick out anything that oozes into cracks.
What can I say, I’m dedicated.
Anyway, had I read the description, I’d have seen that I was purchasing “award-winning bites [that have] spawned a thousand imitators,” as their creators at the California-based Kiva put it. They continue, “Delicious dried blueberries are dusted with cocoa powder then finished with a generous coating of creamy milk chocolate infused with cold water hash. Each of these handcrafted treats takes 10+ hours to create.”
Sounds about right to me. They’re phenomenal, something different and then some. Small enough to shoot out of a small straw and hit your friend in the face. But why would you want to? That would be awfully generous.
Plus they’re fruit, so health nuts, line up. And speaking of nuts, I have some combinations in mind (some of which feature the other spinoff versions of this product, one with espresso bean and the other with sea salt and caramel).
I know that some of you are reading this and saying, Yeah General Obvious, Terra Blueberry Bites, I’ve been munching them for long enough to simply call them the “Blueberries” (the manufacturer’s nickname). To which I reply, Then where the hell were you to recommend them when I started to get sick of gummies months ago?
Or who knows, maybe you did tell me, and I wasn’t paying attention.
Citizen Strain/Grain is an amalgamation of a bunch of us who, in addition to the hard and oftentimes depressing journalism we report for the Dig, also enjoy sampling and writing about the various beers, spirits, and cannabis products that vendors from near and far send our way. If you want us to check out your product, please contact us at firstname.lastname@example.org.